The only time I know that it's easy to do a name change is during the marriage process, since name changes are expected? Apparently it's streamlined (possibly for all parties, depending on what the final form of the last name is, but definitely for the wife)? Someone I know waited until later, after the wedding, to decide to change her name and apparently it was VERY bothersome.
But, idk, I feel like changing your name can be as complicated or as not as you want, like, emotionally? I know a guy who changed his name to Turing, because he wanted to, and I don't think he stressed about it. But I've been front row my trans friends' fraught efforts to shed their old names straight into the gutter. So idk? Its your name to do with what you will, so I don't think you need a reason other than 'I want to' in the end.
I just...think...that changing your name should be an active 'to' thing instead of a reactive 'away' thing? Like. /ponders. Lingering trauma is a thing, and it sucks that this particular bucket of it is tied to racism. At The Same Time, I think if you do change it (instead of saying 'fuck everyone' which I am personally very fond of) then change to something that makes you happier, something that doesn't press on bruises, and something that you're pleased to share with others, yanno? The cruelties from the past are from another lifetime, and it sucks that they left their mark on you. Just...how embedded to you feel your name is into yourself and what would you gain by shedding it?
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2022-10-22 10:34 pm (UTC)But, idk, I feel like changing your name can be as complicated or as not as you want, like, emotionally? I know a guy who changed his name to Turing, because he wanted to, and I don't think he stressed about it. But I've been front row my trans friends' fraught efforts to shed their old names straight into the gutter. So idk? Its your name to do with what you will, so I don't think you need a reason other than 'I want to' in the end.
I just...think...that changing your name should be an active 'to' thing instead of a reactive 'away' thing? Like. /ponders. Lingering trauma is a thing, and it sucks that this particular bucket of it is tied to racism. At The Same Time, I think if you do change it (instead of saying 'fuck everyone' which I am personally very fond of) then change to something that makes you happier, something that doesn't press on bruises, and something that you're pleased to share with others, yanno? The cruelties from the past are from another lifetime, and it sucks that they left their mark on you. Just...how embedded to you feel your name is into yourself and what would you gain by shedding it?